Job seeker ghosts hiring manager for role that pays $30k more, she becomes his boss 3 years later: 'I am no longer interested in working here'

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Ally Perry • Writer and Editor
Apr 23, 2026 9:15 AM EDT

Working in an industry that is a small field can be a blessing and a curse.

On the one hand, it is easier than in many sectors to make valuable connections. On the other hand, a person may swiftly face the consequences if they mistreat these professional relationships. To keep working in such a role with a minimum of awkwardness, it is wise not to burn any bridges.

No matter what good intentions an employee may have, life may have other ideas on how they are going to operate in the working world. Maybe they have no choice but to work with somebody they can't stand, or their circumstances change in such a way that it leaves a peer in an annoying position. It happens all the time.

One of the more common scenarios when somebody may inconvenience or insult a person in the professional sphere is when they are pretty certain they are not going to see them again. There are times when this seems like a risk worth taking, or maybe they are just left with no other choice. Unfortunately, life can have a funny way of bringing back into our lives those whom we have long forgotten about, even if they aren't welcome.

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  • Male and female businesspeople sit at opposite ends of a couch shaking hands, a laptop on the coffee table in front of them
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    Male and female businesspeople sit at opposite ends of a couch shaking hands, a laptop on the coffee table in front of them

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • An individual in the nonprofit sector faced a stressful period three years ago when searching for a new job while moving location and going through a divorce. He initially accepted a role that he believed he was underqualified for, but then abruptly left it behind when he got an offer for a better paid job.

    He remembered this incident once again when his current company acquired a new CEO, who happened to be the hiring manager for that job he had rejected back then. Reporting directly to her, he was anxious about how to address the interaction between them when she was in her previous role.

  • Ghosted a hiring manager that is now my boss

    I just am posting this hoping people enjoy my professional f up. About 3 years ago I moved into my current location. I had to move rather abruptly and needed a job in my field asap. I applied to a job that was easily well below my qualifications. I accepted it and signed for it. It was a 2 year commitment and I figured I could just bounce after that.
    via Koolstads
  • About two weeks later I got a job that pays 30k more. I was not expecting this. I immediately accepted it. I sent a rather abrupt email to the hiring managers assistant of the old job saying "I am no longer interested in working here. thanks"
    via Koolstads
  • it was rode and unprofessional. She called me 3 times and I never answered. I definitely fed them over and never really gave a reason. At the time, I was mid divorce/move and was not really thinking about the smallness of my industry or long term relationships. I just needed money and job (And it turns out, therapy)
    via Koolstads
  • fast forward three years, our work just got a new CEO... it's the hiring manager I ghosted 3 years ago. I report directly to them
    via Koolstads
  • Im currently on extended leave and I'm 100% not looking forward to our 1 on 1 meeting on my return. Fortunately my last name changed, but my first name is very unique and my work history is also unique. I'm 100% sure she will put it together anyways. that's all. enjoy!
    via Koolstads
  • EDIT: to clarify, I work in nonprofits. the Hiring Manager was also the VP of the last org. it's not like this was a large tech industry thing
    via Koolstads
  • Male and female businesspeople sit on a couch opposite another businessman, who is speaking while they listen
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    Male and female businesspeople sit on a couch opposite another businessman, who is speaking while they listen

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • Historical-Whole-153 IF she brings it up, tell her that time was a very rough period for you, and explain that you've experienced a lot of growth in your professional and personal maturity since then. Then. set about proving it to her while also applying for other jobs (just in case).
    via Historical-Whole-153
  • Construction Much802 Will they even remember??
    via ConstructionMuch802
  • Csherman92 When you meet her, apologize for the ridiculous situation and why you had to leave. You were going through a divorce! Its kind of understandable
    via Csherman92
  • Sonoran RoadRunner Just tell them you were going through divorce, it's very stressful.
    via SonoranRoadRunner
  • MamaMiaXOX Don't say anything unless she does. The odds of her remembering are slim to none. If she says something just apologize and say that you were going through several life changes at the time and weren't yourself.
    via MamaMiaXOX
  • debirdiev If she even remembers you, and even less likely brings it up, just be honest. "I was going through a divorce, life was stressful, and I needed as much income as possible to bounce back on my feet. I didn't handle that situation
    via debirdiev
  • as well as I should have and fully acknowledge I was wrong. I hope we can work well together in this new setting" done. Ez
    via debirddiev
  • Lazydayvelvetteen Oh who cares. You know how often hiring managers ghost others?
    via Lazydayvelvetteen
  • oldlexus570 Tell her you got the offer to work where she works now too
    via oldlexus570
  • Own_Credit9508 You don't need to apologize for something you did at a different company neither of you work for anymore. Are you planning to go back to it? We are all human and we have to make decisions for ourselves. That woman has made
    via Own_Credit9508
  • rocky decisions too. She shouldn't expect an apology from you for something that happened under different employment, and if she puts two and two together and brings it up, it's unprofessional on her end. She doesn't work for them anymore, so why does it matter? If
    via Own_Credit9508
  • she holds that moment against you at your current job of 3 years, shes the unprofessional one. If the shoes were reversed, would you hold it over her head? What if she was reporting to you now and not you to her? It wouldn't even bother you. If she brings it up, cut it off. That moment has nothing to do with now.
    via Own_Credit9508
  • Straightwad lol that's not anything you did wrong, a better opportunity came up and you sent an email saying you were no longer interested. It happens. Unlikely she even remembers you or holds a grudge.
    via Straightwad
  • These Rule7995 "Ahhh okay I see you have met my twin. Honestly he/she has always struggled with responsibility in their whole life and I've always had to pick up the slack at home when we we kids."
    via These_Rule7995

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Awkward employee boss job job interview manager workplace hiring
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